Nov 19 2007
What do you do for Christmas?
Newsflash: Christmas spotted just around the corner.
Yes folks, five short weeks (or 36 more sleeps). Are you ready?
No? Me either. Haven’t even started. It doesn’t help that I HATE SHOPPING. Probably makes me a disgrace to the female race. Or something. But at least I’m not alone.
So the mention of Christmas (in November) always gives me butterflies, and the closer to December 25th it gets, the butterflies turn to giant frogs.
And of course the closer it gets, the worse the shopping experience – because there are so many more PEOPLE. You think I’d learn to have it done in October. You’d think.
Then thoughts start turning to the actual day/s. How much more complicated is Christmas becoming? I think a lot more complicated than it was 20 or 30 years ago, that’s for sure.
Think of the number of blended families. Mum and Dad divorced. Mum and Dad remarry. Potentially four sets of Grandparents, or step grandparents. Add in boyfriends, girlfriends and spouses (who could be in the same family situation), in-laws, siblings, cousins… Phew! I’m exhausted thinking about it.
Then you get family traditions “but we always have Christmas lunch/dinner at my Mum’s, we’ve been doing it for 20 years”.
Some families alternate – his parents for lunch one year, hers the next. Or lunch at one place, dinner at another (ugh, I’m full just thinking about it).
Others spread it out over Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day (Dec 26th). Some even have special Christmas celebrations a couple of weeks prior to the day. My brother-in-law is one of (I always forget exactly how many) around eight kids, so they usually do this in December. That frees all the “in-laws” to do things with their family on the day. Very practical.
I still haven’t thought that much ahead. It’ll probably be lunch at my Mum and Dad’s in Sydney, and either dinner or Boxing day at my in-laws in Wollongong. I’ve already earmarked dinner with my husband’s children for the 23rd – they are getting to the age where they have boyfriends/girlfriends/friends to fit in with, along with their mother and grandparents.
How do you cope, and do you think blended families have made Christmas that much more complicated?
12 Responses to “What do you do for Christmas?”
We have a blended family – me and my dad, plus step-mother and her 4 kids. Add in 5 partners, and now 3 (nearly 5) grandchildren. Ugh
My step-mother does a big xmas do the Sunday before xmas. It’s getting harder and harder as we’ve scattered a bit. Plus my daughter’s birthday is on the 22nd of December, and we like to be home for it. With a step-brother in Canberra, a step-sister in the US, and the other three of us spread across Queensland, it’s always a challenge. Maybe next year?
I’m having people here for breakfast. They can be here for the kids to open their pressies, then run away. I get to stay in my air-conditioning (very important when you’re 7.5 months pregnant) and everyone gets the rest of the day to do stuff, and my kids can play with their toys without interruptions 😉
Nothing exciting this year – but I’m off on holidays next week – hooray!
I am lucky, because most of my rellies are in the UK. My wife only has one sister. We have cousins, who are the same age as our kids, but they like to do their own thing for Christmas, which leaves my wife’s mum, who we will likely hook up with, but perhaps not on Christmas day itself. We are moving into our new home just before Christmas, so I am sure that will be what we will be doing.
Shopping: I’m a big believer in online shopping and so much the better if they also do giftwrapping and cards. I think I will go one better this year and ensure that I don’t have to be caught at a supermarket checkout around that period when grocery carts are at their fullest, kids are in major melt-down mode and the shopping centre music is at it’s worst.
Xmas is usually spent at my sister and bro-in-law’s……they consider family members a unique solution to house-sitting as they spend their time out and about …good help can be so hard to find. This is an improvement, as they actually like to spend Xmas in another country altogether. I pack the car with 3 days of food, enough for everybody – they don’t eat at home – and I’m too sure whether they actually live there. The last time I ate something from their Fridge I spent Xmas day vomitting bile at the ceiling. They were really great about that, they brought me a bucket
…on their way out the door.
I think they must have dialled their lawyer while they were out because they muttered something about spider bites 14 hours later when they returned. And they let me open the dogs’ Xmas presents!….I tried to swap my jam for the Dog Spa but the woofies wouldn’t trade.
Xmas that slid off the pages of a Charles Dickens novel. I’m counting off the days already.
All our rellies are in the UK as well. I feel exactly the same way as you do Meg and I remember the problems trying to keep everyone happy with divorced parents, 4 sisters and 1 brother. Now I don’t really pay attention to Christmas at all – well as much as that’s possible. We go to the Woodford Folk Festival over the holiday period.
We’ll miss our families though especially as my sister had her first child (Beth Olivia) in Madrid a couple of days ago so everyone’s excited about that and we feel further away than normal.
We have a family blog! Lots of comments over the last couple of days
When we’re back in Australia we have a crazy Christmas, juggling my husband’s divorced parents, his dad’s new family, my parents and all the partners, kids and animals. At the end of the day we are exhausted and stuffed to the gills with food.
This year we are having Christmas here in Mexico – with a few family members visiting. It is so much more relaxing and less stressful and we don’t have to leave the house all day. The kids cope so much better too (less chance of a meltdown this way). Last year we did the same thing as I was 8.5 months pregnant at Christmas, ready to pop any day and really not up to a big day. Chiq ended up arriving on 3rd Jan and my husband’s birthday is the 2nd Jan so its a very busy time for us!
Gahhhhhh.. Christmas. Am so glad I’m not the only one who isn’t a fan of shopping.
Our tradition has always been to have our big family dinner (just mum, dad, sibling & grandma) on Christmas Eve – that way, we can all catch up with our different friends and family members on Christmas Day. It works really well, actually.
This year will be strange – as I’m moving to London ON Christmas Day! Yikes!
Kin – so true about the air conditioning. I spent 4 Christmases either 5 or 8 months pregnant – so I know where you’re at. Staying put for the day sure has its advantages. I hope you have a nice holiday 😀
Colin – sounds nice and simple, well except for the moving bit 😉 good luck!
blueblue – I hadn’t thought about grocery shopping around that time! Might have to check out Coles or Woolies online, or go at midnight.
LOL – I like your recount. Yes, best take your own food.
Christine – Congrats on the niece! A family blog – that’s a great idea.
Geura – that’s nice that you have some family members visiting – and that you get to stay put. We’re busy in January too with 3 birthdays.
Alyndabear – that does sound like a good arrangement. London’s not long now – does that mean you’ll arrive there in time to see Jason on Christmas Day?
I am Scrooge. I HATE shopping with a passion, HATE consumerism and HATE having the family together when I know there is always going to be a fight about “Mrs Johnson who said you stole her Gerbera when you were seven.”
I am a blended family all on my own – two ex husbands (one I talk to, one I do not) with two children to each. Third husband has no kids or ex wives (THANK GOD!). He’s also the one I love best of all and all four kids just adore him.
I think Christmas is best handled by sleeping through it, unless somebody has purchased me what I really want – a 5 acre rainforest haven away from the shops and all the relatives!
But….we’re having a lovely family day. A cabin with picnic lunch in the rainforest (same place Paul and I were married) where we can all swim and laugh at people who are at home slaving away because that’s what they think they have to do.
Christmas, for us, is about enjoying family, not dreading them. Ours is now too big to get to all of them because we have to, so, we set the day to our liking and just invite them all to come to us if they can (or want to). Kids will come because they want their presents.
And…we hope to get mini breaks in to Sydney and Melbourne at some time over the break as well. That is really exciting for me….and no, no kids are coming with me! I went to school in Mosman, Sydney and Christmas at Mossman holds some very precious memories for me. Oh God, I so want that carefree Christmas enjoyment again.
Hi Meg,
Christmas this year will be interesting. I’ll try and get to see my kids sometime the week before and everything else is totally optional. Might spend it with my friend Donna and her rellies, or sit and drink with other friends.
There have been issues with blended families in the past that are well and truly past now – I will try and see my stepmother Kath if I get to Melbourne. The relationship breakup means that there are a lot of people I don’t need to worry about visiting (more out of respect for their wishes rather than not wanting to see them). The real friends will be there to be visited, and they’ll make me feel welcome, bless them.
On Christmas Days past there have been big celebrations with lots of relatives and friends and roast duck/turkey on the Weber and lots of imported beer.
I think that as far as shopping goes, a good Christmas is like a good landing – one you can walk away from. The rampant consumerism sh*ts me to tears. I like the celebration aspect but I’m over the rest of it. Let the little kids enjoy it while the magic lasts, but the rest of us crowding one another in droves of long faces through every shopping centre makes me wonder why people bother.
Best regards, Andrew
Megan – LOL! Do you really hate shopping, I thought I remember a weekend shopping trip with your daughter not so long ago – or was that not by choice?
For the record (and my mum’s benefit), I don’t dread the family – it just struck me how much more complicated it gets with blended families (like your own)! I’m glad you’ve got a nice day planned – and some time for you
Andrew
Christmas with good friends can be every bit as rewarding as family (some would argue more so 😉 ). Years ago I had some single friends who for whatever reason did not have family in Sydney and they would have an “orphan’s Christmas” (their term). They always had a wow of a time!
I agree that Christmas is definitely for the little kids – “while the magic lasts”. When you’re grown up it so often turns to a stressful occasion…
Oh my god. 36 sleeps.
I somehow can’t quite believe that.
We don’t really do much. Maybe we’ll go snorkelling this year. Christmas day is a good day to go to the beach, nobody else goes. 😉
Cheers,
Snoskred
Well, I’m definitely in the “love Christmas” camp but I have done quite a bit of my shopping online and via catalogue this year which has been FANTASTIC! Plus I enjoy going down the “charity gifts” line as well (eg TEAR, World Vision etc). Leaves me slightly less stressed and able to enjoy the season a lot more.